I was sitting in my favorite coffee shop last Tuesday, watching people queue for their morning caffeine when it hit me like a poorly calibrated centrifuge — I wasn’t actually seeing people standing in line for coffee. I was witnessing a complex resource distribution system that had absolutely nothing to do with the cash exchanging hands. Look, I’ve been thinking about status all wrong for years. We’re taught that social hierarchies are fundamentally about money…
It started, as most modern tragedies do, with an email. “We’re excited to announce some changes to your streaming experience!” the subject line read, with the kind of forced enthusiasm that immediately made my stomach drop. I’ve been around the digital block enough times to recognize the telltale signs of a company about to hose me. I’d been a loyal subscriber to StreamBox (name changed to protect me from their undoubtedly predatory terms of service)…
There is a test of bravery that every adult around the world has to face at some point in his/her life – using a public toilet. This is a phenomenon that cuts across cultures, economies, and the level of dignity people try to maintain. Everyone comes close to that door with the same wishful thinking: ‘I pray to everything that it is clean.’ It is equal to the prayers we all say at the Canadian…
It was never my plan to have a small robotic overseer tracking my every move. I received the fitness tracker as a birthday gift from my sister who has always believed that my life could be greatly improved if I was constantly monitored like a Cold War spy. “It’ll motivate you,” she said while looking at me eagerly as I opened the sleek black band. “It counts your steps!” Counting steps as transformative is quite…
I was seventeen when I first had the panic attack about my atoms. It happened during AP Chemistry while Mr. Finley was explaining nuclear decay rates. “The calcium in your bones,” he said, gesturing vaguely at our teenage skeletons, “will still exist long after our sun burns out.” Something about this casual observation hit me like a biochemical sledgehammer. I excused myself, locked myself in a bathroom stall, and hyperventilated for approximately 7.3 minutes while…
I consider myself reasonably tech-savvy. I’ve got the usual array of smart devices scattered throughout my apartment, dutifully listening to my every word and occasionally turning the lights on when I actually wanted them off. I’ve accepted the algorithmic overlords that determine what I see online. I’ve even made peace with the fact that my phone knows more about my movement patterns than my own mother does. But I’ve always drawn a hard line…
I made the mistake of commenting on a news article on Tuesday. I want to clarify that it was nothing controversial, just my take on a local infastructure project that I thought was bonkers expensive. Seventeen minutes later, I had been called a fascist, a comunist, an enemy of progress, and… my favorite, “*boomer with keyboard diarreah*,” by someone calling themselves “TruthWarrior426” Welcome to the world of online debate, where there is no room for…
I’ve been teetering on the edge of my sofa for forty-five minutes, eyes glued to the screen, heart practically in my throat. The characters I’ve followed for seven seasons are finally – FINALLY – about to reveal who murdered the town’s beloved baker. The music swells. The camera zooms dramatically on the detective’s face as she opens the folder containing the DNA results. Her eyes widen. She looks up and says, “The killer is—” And…
Honestly, I remember a time when silence was just silence. Back in the day, all you had to do was find the nearest quiet corner, grab a good book, sit down and the world would slowly fade away without any effort on your part. No buttons had to be pressed, no batteries were required, and no Bluetooth devices had to be connected. But for some reason, humanity decided that wasn’t enough. They went ahead and…
Last Tuesday, I took a look at my microwave and saw that I have wasted both my time and effort turning a frozen lasagna into molten goo via radiation. The lasagna was glowing, and indeed appeared potently as if some parts of it were partially melting, but nowhere near what I was expecting it to be. The cheese seemed to cling on to one side while the rest of the dish was laden with sauce…